Re-Testing

It seems that there are some struggles that I repeat over and over. Just when I think that I have victory over them, back they come. (It reminds me of 1 Corinthians 10:12.)

The past five or six weeks have been spent in a chronic illness flare-up. As the “cellular level fatigue” drags on, my longsuffering begins to suffer. Loneliness and isolation take their toll. This is typically when the devil starts hitting me with lies of worthlessness, justified self-pity and discontent. This time is no exception. For my fellow chronic-illness sufferers, there is hope. Experience has taught me that God is my refuge. His Word, my relationship with Him and prayer are the only things that will pull me out. This is NOT to say that it is easy. It has been a continual struggle for me…as my close friend and prayer partner can attest. (Praise God for the friends who encourage and exhort us, walking through the trial and helping us focus our gaze on Him!)

This time, I happened to be studying through Exodus and saw a pattern. Being tested with the same trial repeatedly is not unique to me as the Devil has tried to tell me. Look at what the Israelites went through.

1. God places the Israelites in Egypt and promises release in Exodus 4:29-31 and 5:23. Then, things get harder for them. They complain to Moses in the end of chapter 5. What does Moses do? He goes to God directly instead of complaining. God’s response? Reassurance in Exodus 6:1-13. God will prevail!
2. So, God removes them from Egypt and slavery (Exodus 13), but then he puts them between the Red Sea and the Egyptians in Exodus 14. The people complain and panic even after seeing God’s greatness in bringing them out. Moses goes to God. God delivers!
3. The people are ecstatic for a little while when God delivers them the second time from Egypt, but then, in Chapter 15, they need water. So, do they turn to God, no. They … are you ready for this… complain. The people complain. Moses goes to God. God gives them water.
4. The next trial that God leads them to is found in Exodus 16 and involves no food. You would think that by this time, they would say, “Cool, can’t wait to see what God is going to do through this!” But, no… they… complain. And, God provides food.
5. Exodus 17 shows another familiar trial. The people have no water. Now, I do understand the fact that we have to have water to survive, but hadn’t God shown Himself strong in this before? The people complain again. Moses goes to God. And, God provides. Do you see a pattern here?
6. In Exodus 17 the end of the chapter, God allows them to face war. Moses takes command and trusts God and God gives victory!
7. What about me in my struggle? How am I going to respond? God is there and working. We need to seek Him and trust Him!

God also has used some of the verses that I’ve been memorizing to speak to my heart.

1. 1 Peter 4:7-13 - 7But the end of all things is at hand: be ye therefore sober, and watch unto prayer. 8And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins. 9Use hospitality one to another without grudging. 10As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. 11If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen. 12Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: 13But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy. NOTE: I must use my gifts that God has given me. I must see that my suffering is not unusual.
2. Psalm 37:3-5 3Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. 4Delight thyself also in the LORD: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. 5Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. NOTE: I must trust Him, delight in Him, commit my way to Him. He will give me the desires of my heart; the desire to honor Him!
3. Acts 4:13 13Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marvelled; and they took knowledge of them, that they had been with Jesus. NOTE: Can people tell that I’ve been with Jesus?
4. 1 Corinthians 7:23-24 23Ye are bought with a price; be not ye the servants of men. 24Brethren, let every man, wherein he is called, therein abide with God. NOTE: Am I serving God who has bought me or man? Am I abiding with God where He has called me even if that is pain?
5. Romans 4:19-21 19And being not weak in faith, he considered not his own body now dead, when he was about an hundred years old, neither yet the deadness of Sarah’s womb: 20He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God; 21And being fully persuaded that, what he had promised, he was able also to perform. NOTE: Am I looking at God and His promises or my weakness? Also, look at what God did with the five loaves and two fish! But, what if the little boy would have refused to give the lunch because it was so small in the midst of great need or that he had looked at the people around him and seen the major gifts that they could offer. Nothing would have been done.
6. 1 Corinthians 10:5-6 5But with many of them God was not well pleased: for they were overthrown in the wilderness. 6Now these things were our examples, to the intent we should not lust after evil things, as they also lusted. NOTE: Ouch! The Israelites were our examples. They failed when God put them in the wilderness. God didn’t point out how they did in the land of plenty, but how they did in the wilderness. I do not want God to be displeased with me, but well-pleased. I MUST bring every thought into captivity (2 Corinthians 10:5). I long for God not to be ashamed to be called my God! Hebrews 11:16.

The Israelites were tested over and over and failed. Will I fail these tests that God has allowed? Will I listen to lies or to God’s truth?

How about you?